One of the things I had to remind myself today was the importance to listen.
-We are all guilty of not listening fully before rushing to interrupt
-We are guilty of creating conclusions before we learn all the facts.
I know I’m guilty of that as well, so I have to remind myself from time to time.
We often think we are listening to the other person because we let them talk first, but in fact we are just waiting for our turn to speak. I’ve seen that numerous times where two people have a conversation, but instead of listening, taking a moment, contemplating on what they’ve heard and then responding, they’re interrupting the other person right away. It’s almost as if they are in a competition of who gets to tell their own story first.
How often you have someone described something that they’ve been through and you just couldn’t wait for them to finish so you can tell them how you’ve been through the same exact situation.
-For example if someone is excitingly sharing with you that they got a promotion, or they’ve been rewarded for something. Please let them have their moment, don’t steal that away by saying that the same thing happened to you. It’s not about you, it’s about them.
By jumping into the conversation and sharing how this is similar to something that you’ve done or experienced, it puts you in a wired situation where you’re comparing yourself to the other person, when in fact we’re so different. Comparing yourself to others it’s not the right approach, we judge others by how we think, assuming that our way is correct. That is very subjective of course.
Listen to the other person’s story without judging, without coming up with advices, unless you are asked for it. Just listen and accept. If you do that, you will eventually have the other person listening to you with more patience and they will find it very easy to talk to you.
So make a point to hear the other person first, because that’s the only way you’ll be able to help, don’t judge, just open up your mind to possibilities before jumping to a conclusion